My breath excitedly racing
My heart smiling
My eyes sparkling
My cheeks glowing..
As I play hide and seek with (very adorable) Taiwanese nine year old boys.
What was once in my heart meant to be a plain straightforward ruled out game for little kids instantly changed to what I now perceive as the foremost adventurous hiding, looking, running, stopping, jumping, rolling, peaking, crouching and last but not least seeking.
I almost tripped as I ran from underneath a little shelter to jumping underneath a railing and crouching behind a bush because I couldn't help but laugh as my adventurous heart felt joy like a child again.
Hand gestures like those showing to be quiet, 'come quickly,' thumbs up and high fives quickly made the discouragement of language barriers fade away.
It was absolute pure joy!
I've come to learn a different way God loved people through me with His fierce and passionate love.
Doing children's ministry in the nations was something I haven't experienced before.
Specifically at one vacational bible school for children. I was the only leader of a group of children between the ages of 6 and 12. At first I got soooo frustrated not having a translator and not being able to understand what the children were saying to me and they not understanding me. I was so discouraged at one point then the holy spirit reminded me to just surrender. Through the humbling of my pride, He reminded me that I can't do it on my own strength. How wonderfully patient He actually always is with us?
Soon after I pitied myself and surrendered to Yeshua, I realized that lovingly touching these children such as caressing their hair, hugging them, highfiving them, holding them on my lap, holding their hands - they flourished! They were laughing, enjoying their time without being naughty and obeyed me even when they didn't understand. (I'm telling you we are serving a God of miracles!) My heart froze in awe of how God's love flow through me when I put my hand on a girl's shoulder who had a lot of anger cropt up inside of her. She moved closer and closer under my arm like a little chick moving into the warm embrace of the mother hen's wing. Since that moment, where I believe this girl felt truely unconditionally loved, her anger changed into laughter, her hardened precious heart evolved into that of a gentle and loving spirit. The children started seeking me more to hug them, highfive them, play with their hair. My what was once discouragement and frustration completely transformed by an unconditional love I couldn't explain. I wondered if this was how Jesus felt. When He was being pushed and squeezed through crowds of people when one woman with faith that she can be healed intentionally touched the fringe of his garment. She longed for something unexplainable, with unexplainable faith and Jesus knew this. His love for her was tremendous, personal, intimate as He called her out and honoured her.
I learnt that God's love stretches far beyond language barriers, far beyond our weaknesses and our doubts and unbelief whether God can use us. God's love is childlike exciting, unconditional, joyfilled, adventurous, faithful, intricated into who we are. We need to seek and find that childlike faith hiding within us again. To see the beauty in the small, to be honest and real, offer who we are without our attempts in defending our wounded hearts. We need to allow Jesus to break down the walls we have built in order to feel His true, real, unconditional love for us and through us to people.