Why are you here? Why did you decide to do this journey? What did you want out of it? Were you prepared to give up this much?
Throughout the last few weeks i’ve been confronted with questions that challenged my heart in a very surreal way.
Have you found comfort in your uncomfortable circumstances? Are you comforted by the people in your team that has become family to you?
Get uncomfortable.
Comfort can become the killer if you let it.
Who would’ve thought that one can find comfort and become comforted in the most uncomfortable circumstances?
And once you find comfort in everything BUT Jesus, you start to miss comforts and to be comfortable. You miss home. You miss your moms care when you feel sick. You miss your brother’s guitar playing in the back round of the house. You miss your every night bed and food you can choose from. You miss a simple thing like a flushing toilet and toilet paper.
And just like that. You have forgotten what the journey is all about and you’re sitting in a puddle of self-petty that you’ve created.
I don’t see Jesus in this equation, AT ALL.
“Don’t worry, just stick it out for the last 8 weeks.”
And what will that teach you? Endurance?
NO! It’ll let you wish by the 8 weeks that you have left, of an opportunity that you might not ever get again.
GET OVER YOURSELF.
I’m here to SERVE and GIVE.
I did this journey to see what a God seeking lifestyle looks like.
I want MORE of Jesus.
If that means I give up everything. So be it.
A very clear incision has been made to the thought of this year. Thinking I had already learnt all the lessons I had to, and thinking that this year is the only time I have to squeeze in all my life lessons.
I feel expectation running down my back so heavily. Expectation for the next 8 weeks and expectation for life after journey.
I feel hope clinging to my hand and leading me into the greatness of the unknown.
I feel the Fathers eyes gazing into mine with utmost love.
And just like that. I’ve seen His face; and i can’t walk away.