As you read on my previous blogs my journey so far was incredible!
And boom just here at the end in the last 3 months everything changed. I didn’t even think of how things can change and how I can actually go through suffering, or through difficult times, but I did and now I can also just say I made it , I’m still keen for the last 2 months , I’m still open for more of Jesus, but it took me a month to say this and to be excited for the last 2 months again.
Our team were divided into 2 groups for the last 3 months of journey, it was so unexpected and I was not ready to do the last part of journey without the other half of my team, but I knew Jesus had a plan and that was the only thing that kept me going.
We started with a luke 10 , just a couple of days after the split and I was actually really excited, Jesus really tested me on Luke 10 , it was so challenging. I was so negative I literally wanted to go home , the last night of luke 10 was the worst, we slept outside. I was so over it. Everything in the beginning after the split was just not good for me , but I realized I needed to spend time with Jesus I needed to sit at His feet, I needed Him!
I saw a spider catching a insect that was running so fast and just as it caught the insect the insect couldn’t go on , and it hit me I realized it’s what happend with me. I was running so fast in my freedom and the enemy saw a chance to catch me , and my choice was to stay in the prison or to keep on fighting to get out. As you heard in the beginning I was stuck in prison and I was negative as soon as I got this revelation I knew I needed to do something.
I asked Jesus everyday for new strength and hope for these last 2 months. One morning in Laos at the church we were staying I looked up at a mountain and it was covered with clouds , except the top of the mountain and I felt Jesus telling me your almost on top keep going!
He gave me new hope for the last 2 months and He taught me that I need to embrace the journey , because things may not always turn out how I want them to be or how I expect them to be - but if I embrace the journey , on the journey I’m becoming and my character is growing!
If you see life as a journey with God; you learn that life is all about seasons - the beautiful thing is that seasons change, but God do not change.
I also learned that God is not only showing up for me, but also for others to see how faithful He is in my life, it’s not just about me.
2 Corinthians 12:8-10 (the message)
My grace is enough; it’s all you need.
My strength comes into its own in your weakness.
Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ’s strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size — abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.
Now I can say - when I trust in Jesus I don’t need to understand why things are turning out differently than I wanted them to, because Jesus knows what He is doing.