Hey all:)
When I was thinking about what to write with regard to what I have experienced in training so far my initial thinking was to talk about all the amazing things God has done. To go into detailed stories about seeing God genuinely save people, seeing His faithfulness time and time again, stories of the beginnings of an expected, unstoppable revival in JBay. I was even tempted to share some of the funny stories and adventures I have had, the people I have met or even the way my eyes started sweating on the day I left friends and family in Gauteng (obviously due to the fact that real men don't cry;)
So much has happened and theres so much I could mention and talk about. But at the end of the day I don't feel I need to share stories and my experiences because ultimately every story, every experience, every adventure points directly to the fact that behind all
these things, there is a passionate, fierce, unfathomable God that is orchestrating and intimately involved in every detail of what happens during this year and every other year. And I have come to realise very quickly that it is not about me, not about my team, not even about the countries and people we minister to. NO it is all about Jesus, it is His story, His world and we are His people.
Colossians 3:3 says "For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God". That verse blows my mind and is such a beautiful picture of the one who is in control of our lives and it keeps bringing me back to that point where I need to surrender my hopes, dreams and desires on a daily basis to seek His face, His will and to seek first the kingdom of God above all else.
One of the main reasons I decided to do this year of missions was because I was in a continual state of frustration at myself at how easy it was to settle into comfortable
Christianity. As in the words of a song by Mathew West- "I don't want to go through the motions, I don't want to go one more day, without your all consuming passion inside of me. I don't want to spend my whole life asking what if I had given everything, instead of going through the motions". And I just realised that it's so easy to get sucked into a routine of going through the motions. To quote bible verses like "Trust in the Lord with all your heart" but then to do everything in my power to make sure that it never gets to that point of actually having to trust God to the extent that if He doesn't come through then I'm in trouble. We don't like the feeling of not being in control but I think that that is the exact place God wants to take us because it is in that place that we learn that God is all we need, He is sufficient, He is faithful, He is the beginning, He is the end and yes He is everything in between including our tiny little lives that are wedged somewhere in this HUGE God
story.
God is passionate, fierce and an all consuming fire and we have the oppurtunity to let that intense fire in our hearts fan life and love into peoples lives around us, yet we tend to hide behind our insecurities, fears and doubts which rob us and the people around us of the amazing things God wants to do in and through us. And as a result that potentially world changing fire in our hearts becomes little more than a sputtering candle.
I have been challenged with John 7:38 which says "Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the scriptures declare, rivers of living water will flow from his heart". Quite honestly I look at my life in the past and I don't see the abundant life of freedom found in Jesus, I struggle to see rivers of living water flowing from me, Rather it sometimes looks like we as Christians have been baptised in lemon juice. Knowing Jesus is LIFE, having the Holy Spirit lead
your life is EXCITING and trusting in the unconditional love of God the Father is FREEDOM from our natural instinct to try and perform or work for God's love. And its once we live in this freedom and excitement that we experience life. And as soon as we experience this life in all it's fullness thats when we will see this world changed for the Glory of God.
Lotsa Llamalicous Love
J