"Something will grow from what you are going through. That thing will be you." - Unknown
Someone very dear to my heart prayed in training that God would ruin my life on this journey. Only now that God took the challenge do I understand what she meant by that.
Our month in Israel has been some of the hardest yet most beautiful days of my life. God broke down walls in my heart that without me even realizing, were keeping Him out more than they were anyone else. He filled these gaps with love and innocence, moulding me and shaping me into the person He created me to be, not the person I was trying to be.
The 'tough' girl that started Global Challenge in January that wasn't too convinced about this whole Jesus thing, that listened to Eminem during quiet time and wouldn't be caught dead shedding a tear in front of others became the emotional one listening to worship music in the corner while telling people about her feelings and how cool Jesus is. I know, gross right?
The past month has consisted of plenty laughter, abundant tears, days of pure joy, longing to go home, not wanting to leave, personal discoveries, revelations and so much of His fierce love.
Basically, i have been on a roller coaster ride that has made me stronger in faith and in character and has left me completely vulnerable for God to come and takeover.
The life I wanted to live before this year, the life of self ambition and worldly desires, crumbled down around me in quite a dramatic manner. He quite happily ruined that life if you ask me. One lesson I took out of this; careful what you challenge God about. He has quite a wicked sense of humor when it comes to getting His way.
I'll happily rise to the challenge of Him ruining my life if it means I can experience Him in the way I have over the past month. From experiencing his sense of humor, His love, provision and security to experiencing His sternness and father's heart, He has completely changed my perspective on what it means to truly lay down your life to follow the Lord.
I truly look forward to having my life ruined further and to step into the life He predestined me to live. It's not going to be pretty (my team will most definitely agree with that), it's not going to be easy, but man, it's going to be worth it.
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