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Participant Blogs
I really thought I had a servant heart. It didn't take a long time into this journey for me to reallize that I was just bluffing myself. That a servant heart can't be a servant heart without a servant spirit.
Galatians 5 :13 ~ For you have been called to live in freedom, both my brothers and sisters. But don't use your freedom to satisfy your sinfull nature. Use your free time to serve one another in love
For me to gain a servant spirit I first of all had to lose my selfishness. And to really invest more time in God and to get to know Him. An intimate relationship. And to try and gain some of His characteristics. What an amazing experience that was. It was like God gave me His eyes for a bit. I got to see people out of His eyesight. People I judged , I saw their strong points. People I would have avoided, I made time for. People I didnt like , I started to love.
It just shows you that that all God wants is a open heart and a seeking spirit...
This was a hard question that kept popping up in our first two countries: Rwanda & Uganda. This was the reason why these two countries was the toughest so far.
I knew that teaching English and sharing some Bible stories with children and building relationship with people might make a difference in some way, I just couldn't see it right then and there. For four weeks this is what we did - and believe me it feels like a lifetime if you are far away from home, are sick, tired and can't seem to see the purpose in you being here. All we really did was spend time with people and listen to them - which was surprisingly exhausting.
Although there is a saying that time is the most precious thing you can give, at that stage it just didn't feel like it made a difference.
What I really needed was for Jesus to come and redefine missions for me. To have people 24/7 around you and find a space to spend personal time with Jesus in this time was really challenging for me and thus it took me awhile to get the answer to this question. Finally one morning God answered my question with a question while I was looking at a new branch of a plant I sat next to. He asked me, "Do you know how I grew this branch" and my answer to this was "No Lord, You do so I don't have to " and just like that God taught me the most freeing thing - I don't always have to know how He works, because He knows.